Trying to get pregnant is a frustrating and sometimes heartbreaking business. There are those of us with medical problems. We seem to endure an endless round of embarrassing tests. The concept of fertility, or lack thereof seems unending and for many women unbearable, as they question the very essence of what makes them women. There have been huge inroads made by the medical profession into this problem though, and most weeks we can pick up a paper or magazine and read again of somebody's 'miracle' child. It gives us the hope to keep trying for a child of our own.
But there are some of us - quite a few, where medical methods are not the answer. We are healthy, we have all the right 'bits' and they work. We have been tested and there is nothing wrong, but still we mourn, as we try to conceive, and every month blood flows. We are told 'don't worry about it so much and it will happen'. We watch our body's clock like a hawk, taking temperatures, checking cervical position and mucus, sex isn't fun anymore, its a mission! I remember a friend of mine dragging her partner off for his 'duty' 4 times in one day while he was suffering badly from flu, simply because it was TIME - she wondered why he left her, but she was obsessed. And still nothing happens.
So, like any intrepid researcher, I went looking for alternatives. First I scanned the Internet (Note, do NOT go searching "Ask Jeeves" for "weird things people do to get pregnant" - I didn't know there was so many weird fetishes people have in their sex lives and none of them pertained to getting pregnant). I did find some interesting information from the Witches Network. Now don't scoff or turn your nose up. I interviewed a Witch a while ago for a separate article and have never met such a delightful lady, and she talked very intelligently about the use of herbs in helping correct a women's body chemistry, to facilitate conception and even the choice of sex, for your child. One particularly interesting site gave potions and spells for helping conception. (Please feel free to email me for the web link if you would like to take a look). But apart from witchcraft I did not come up with anything else. So I went to the library, same problem there. A mound of information pertaining to medical problems, but nothing on what to do when nothing was really wrong. So I did what women have done since time began - I talked to other women.
Have you heard about the full moon ritual. Now apparently this does have some scientific basis for fact - women's bodies are affected by the Moons cycle, some more than others. The ritual involves you and your partner needing to be fully naked, outside, under a full moon - obviously doing your thing. A couple of things need to be considered, such as making sure you are not in a public place, and comfort is another issue. My suggestion is this - make an evening of it, planned in advance. Have your spot picked out, and make sure it is relatively easy to get to in the dark. Take a blanket, a bottle of wine and some 'munchies', so that instead of climbing some hill, or diving in the bushes just for an act of sex, you are having a romantic evening. Find your spot, set yourself up, have a drink and a little picnic and watch the moon rising. Let things happen naturally when two people are in love - quite literally let nature take its course. It may work, it may not. But what it is guaranteed to do is strengthen the relationship you do have with your partner. One other note of caution though, don't mention babies. Enjoy being with your partner, just him, and remind yourself why you are with him. Enjoy what you have instead of pining for something that hasn't happened. You will feel so much better.
That does seem to be the general consensus of all women that I talked to. Keep yourself well, don't let the 'baby issue' cloud the rest of your entire life. Look at being happy in other areas of your life. Enjoy the freedom you have with your partner NOW, not restricted by the demands placed on you by children. Enjoy your career - take a whole change in direction if necessary, you can do that if you don't have other people dependent on you. Enjoy being You, totally the way you are. My first child, Holly, was born after seven years of trying, when I decided to take up a computer course. Maybe it was being busy with the course, maybe my computer had positive 'vibes', but I do know that when I got busy, so did my body.
No comments:
Post a Comment